Which statement I realize, as I type this, is a little contradictory. Huh. Wonder how it is I never noticed that before.
But I digress. Herein we delve into the Palmerwood archives to bring you the tale of Commodore Horatio Frobisher Greville "Fishbait" Palmer, hero of the War of 1812.
Commodore Palmer's major contribution to nautical warfare was the somewhat controversial reintroduction of the galley-ship. Long considered both obsolete (since Viking days, actually) and inhumane, the galley was a concept whose time, the Commodore was just sure as shootin', had come. Again.
"I don't care how big that man-o-war is," he was once heard to bellow from the fo'c'sle, "the fact that we're rowing gives us greater maneuverability."
The above picture also leads me to mention that the Cubbings family has faithfully served us for a long, long time.
In the spring of 1813, while the conflict considered by many eminent historians to be the Second War of Independence raged, the Commodore, accompanied by his hearty crew of galleymen, set off on a daring voyage across the Atlantic on a secret mission: a sneak attack on the English port of Swansea in retribution for the treacherous Redcoats' attack on Washington.
Limey bastards.
The voyage, however, took longer than Commodore Palmer had anticipated, and upon their arrival in 1815, they were greeted with the news that the war had ended the previous year.
Tragedy struck when, unexpectedly, a boathook caught the brave Commodore from behind and swept him out to sea. Thus perished both the redoubtable Commodore Palmer and his dream of seeing an ocean patrolled by American galley-ships.
It is recorded, however, that the mackerel they caught with him was the largest ever seen in the Bristol Channel.
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